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Artificial smile helps to control anger through ‘embodied cognition’

Forty nine year old man, Mr. S., is a middle level executive in a government department. He is unable to control his anger in the work place. A detailed psychiatric interview established that he is mentally normal but for the lack of anger control. The computed tomography scanning his brain showed no abnormality.

In order to get rid of the anger control problem I advised him to “fit” artificial smile on his face while in the work place. I asked him to try fitting an artificial smile in my presence. He tried and succeeded.

I asked him: “How did you feel while you fitted the smile?”

He promptly replied: “I felt relaxed in mind too.”

I advised him to practice this “fitting of smile” while in his workplace.

But he wanted an explanation as regards to the working of this technique. I told him: “This technique works on the principle of embodied cognition.  I explained to him what embodied cognition is.

What is cognition?

In psychology cognition refers to conglomeration of different mental processes. These processes include attention, remembering, understanding and producing speech and language, solving problems, and making decisions. In cognitive science the term usually refers to an information processing view of an individual’s psychological functions. The term cognition is derived from the Latin word cognoscere which means “to know”, “to conceptualize”, or “to recognize”. The term generally refers to a faculty for the processing of information.

Embodied cognition

Generally speaking, the nature of human mind is largely determined by the form of the human body. All aspects of cognition are shaped by aspects of the body. The aspects of cognition include high level mental constructs such as concepts and categories and human performance on various cognitive tasks such as reasoning and judgment. The aspects of the body include the motor or muscular system, the perceptual system, the body’s interactions with the environment or the outside world and the assumptions of future of the world that are built into the body and the brain. The concept of embodied mind considers the body and the mind as a single unit and is opposed to the concept of dualism that is the separateness of body and mind.

Engaging Muscles of Smile

The principle of embodied cognition generally reflects the idea that the muscular or motor system influences our cognition, just as the mind influences bodily functions. Psychologists Arthur M. Glenberg and associates, working in the laboratory of embodied cognition at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, have observed that when the participants in the experiments hold a pencil in their teeth engaging the muscles of smile they comprehended pleasant sentences faster than unpleasant ones. And it worked in reverse too. When the participants held a pencil in their teeth engaging the muscles of frown it took longer time to comprehend pleasant sentences. When the muscles of face are engaged in smile the individual “feels” the smile in mind also.

Best Ways to Relax My Favorites

Finding the best ways to relax are a top priority for me, seeing as I am always plagued by some form of anxiety! And in my case in particular I need methods I can use at home to chill out, and others I can use on the run if I feel a panic attack coming on!

Here is my list of my favorite best ways to relax:

1) Exercise: One of the things I have found to be most effective is to create a foundation of calmness by being sure to go for a walk each day. The problem is I don't always do this. I find it easy to skip if the weather isn't perfect or if I have a really busy day with errands or work. I always pay for this decision later though. If I don't exercise I find that my background state of emotion is always more anxious - giving me a "hair-trigger" response for extreme anxiety or panic attacks!

2) Yoga: I love yoga because it seems to have a relaxing effect on my body as well as my mind. There is something about the yoga poses and the stretching of your muscles that seems to relax my mind. Or maybe it's the calming music in the background? Not sure but yoga is definitely one of my best ways to relax!

3) Music: I find that music seems to have a direct link to my emotions. It seems to bypass the thinking part of my brain and go straight to how I feel. Certain tunes can make me instantly happy, others make me tearful, and others imbue a great sense of calm. Some classical music works especially well for inducing relaxation.

4) Self Hypnosis: Another method I find really effective is self-hypnosis. I use this before I go to sleep. It is a great way to wind down after a busy day. I find it super easy to do and over time I can tell it is helping me to quiet my mind. The biggest benefit though seems to be that I can use some of the key phrases I have heard during hypnosis during the day to instantly relax myself on the go! For sure one of my best ways to relax!

Now you've heard mine. Tell me, what are your best ways to relax?

Five Core Steps to Good Parenting

1. Plug In
Make a conscious decision to plug into your kid's world. You can't make assumptions about the critical choices that children have to make today because the world they are living in is different from the one you grew up in.

2. Spread the Word
When you talk to your children you've got to spread out your logic so that they can see why you're saying what you're saying. Research shows us that the amount of trouble kids get into is inversely proportional to the number of words spoken in the home. What that means is, the less you talk at home, the more trouble they get in outside the home.

3. Talk About Things That Don't Matter
How do you ever expect to talk to them about things that do matter if you haven't practiced by talking about things that don't?

4. Remember, You're the Parent
Children have lots of friends who tell them what they want to hear. They don't need you to be another friend. They need you to be an authority figure who lets them know where the boundaries of acceptable behavior are. Trying to be his or her friend will only undermine your authority as a parent and come back to bite you.

5. Allow Them A Sense of Mastery
You have to put your kids in a world where they feel a sense of mastery over their own environment. It's important that they don't feel they're subject to arbitrary guidance or haphazard decisions.
 

Dr Phil

OFFERING SUPPORT TO LOVED ONES SUFFERING FROM MENTAL ILLNESS

Having a friend or family member who suffers from a mental illness can be really devastating. This is mainly because of the stigma that is there in our society towards people who are diagnosed with such illnesses. The situation becomes even worse when both the patients themselves and their loved ones are not well conversant with the illness that they suffer from. The mere lack of knowledge creates anxiety in itself. Well, here are a few tips, shared from the Karla Smith Foundation, on how to cope with the situation:

1. Educate yourself about the illness.

Educating yourself about your loved one’s illness is really the foundation of support. Research also has shown that education works. According to Dr. Harriet Lefley,a huge body of evidence has shown that if you provide families with education and involve them in the treatment process, patients experience a reduction in symptoms, hospitalization days and relapse. Plus, the family environment is generally improved, she said.

2. Help your loved one find and continue to take the medication needed for a balanced life.

It is essential that a person with a mental health problem takes proper medication in order to live a balanced life. Family and friends of this person need to know what the medication is, the effects it has, and the doctor who prescribes it. If for some reason the medication is no longer effective, the person quits taking the medication, or the side effects become unmanageable, it is the family and friends who often need to intervene and help guide the person back to the medication needed for a balanced life.

3. Urge your loved one to maintain a supportive relationship with a therapist, counselor or sponsor

Along with medication, some form of “talk therapy” is critical for someone with mental health problems. Family and friends can be invaluable in supporting this need for counseling and in assisting their loved one find a therapist, counselor, or sponsor who truly helps the loved one cope with the mental illness. Most often, it is also valuable for the family and friends to seek some form of talk therapy themselves.

4. Assist your loved one in developing a healthy self- esteem since it is critical for a balanced emotional life

Many people with a mental health problem suffer from a damaged self-esteem. Their self-esteem is often either too low or too high. Family and friends are in a position to observe the level of self-esteem in a loved one with mental health problems and to respond appropriately. This ability to observe and respond appropriately implies that the family and friends acquire the skills needed to make these observations and responses.

5. Accept the mental health problem as a fact of life for your loved one even though it does not encompass all of life

A mental disorder can become the exclusive focus of the life of a person with mental health problems and for the family and friends of this person. There are two stages to this strategy: 1) to accept the fact of the mental health problem – often a difficult challenge for both the person with a mental illness and for family and friends; 2) once this fact is acknowledged, it is equally crucial to accept that the disorder does not encompass all of life, that there are also other parts of life that deserve attention and focus

6. Take care of yourselves by proper sleep, diet, relationships and by monitoring your feelings

Often a person with mental illness requires special attention from family and friends. This extra attention can be time consuming, intellectually challenging, and emotionally draining. It is vital that the family and friends take care of their own needs for exercise, sleep, and proper diet. They must also devote time and energy to other relationships in their life, and to identify and express their honest feelings about their loved one with a mental illness.

7. Become a supportive network of family and/or friends who know about the mental health problem and who commit to acting in the best interest of the loved one as far as you are able

It is most helpful for family and friends to form a network of support among themselves as well as with their loved one with mental health problems. A shared knowledge of the illness and a shared responsibility for the loved one offers the best opportunity for a balanced life for everyone. This network will therefore require commitment to the loved one and to each other, including a commitment to resolving conflicts when they arise. 

8. Identify the early warning signs that precede a more difficult phase of the mental illness, and help your loved one when these signs emerge

One of the most important roles of the network of family and friends is to monitor and identify early warning signs of a change in the thinking or behavior of their loved one. Often a change in medication or the effectiveness of a medication, a stressful situation in life, a change in a relationship, etc. will trigger the onslaught of a more difficult stage of the mental illness. The quicker family and friends identify this change, the quicker they can gently intervene and help return their loved one to a more balanced life once again.

9. Acknowledge dependence on a higher power and seek guidance from that higher power in whatever way that is comfortable to you

Most people in our society acknowledge a belief in a Higher Power, whom many identify as God. Mental illness is baffling, to say the least, and utterly destructive, to say the most. In coping with the mental illness of a loved one, many family and friends know that their efforts, support, and effectiveness are limited. We recognize that at some point we are powerless over the illness and over our loved one. Incorporating our belief in a Higher Power, however we understand that belief, offers another dimension to our coping with the mental health problem of a loved one.

We hope that this helps you and we, at the Nairobi Parenting Clinic LTD, are always at your service.

How Children Respond to Double Messages from Parents Part II

In Part I of this post, I began the discussion of how children decide how to respond to consistent double messages about what is expected of them from their parents.  I mentioned that they respond according to three general principles of ranking the conflicting elements of the double message, and described the first.

Hmmm.  I find myself questioning your gesture



In this post, I will describe the other two.  Actually, the first two general principles are merely examples of the third, overaching principle.

Principle #2.: Children pay more attention to what adults say to each other, or to generalizations they make about various issues, than to any direct instructions or admonishment said to children.

For instance, a mother might verbally prod her daughter, in a compulsive repetitive manner, to get married - after having spent years telling anyone who would listen about what jerks all men are, and how unhappy she is with her own spouse (her daughter’s father). The degree of the mother's preoccupation with both the subject and her daughter's stand on the issue would quite likely lead the girl to the conclusion that her choice regarding marriage is of major concern to the mother.

Once again I will ask you to suspend your disbelief and assume that the daughter's appraisal of the mother's opinion, right or wrong though it may be, will be a major determinant of what the daughter does, regardless of the daughter's own personal preference. So what to do? The mother's negative comments about men, according to principle #2, would seem more important than the direct admonition to marry, so most likely the daughter would not marry.

However, once again, she will face criticism if she stays celibate. A possible solution is for the daughter in such a situation to end up picking a series of jerks with which to hook up, in order to satisfy both ends of the double message. That is, she follows her mother’s instructions and keeps trying to find a husband, but proves that her mother is correct about how men really are.

Whether she dates a series of jerks or actually marries and then divorces a series of jerks will usually depend on other relationship issues in her family of origin, such as what role her father plays in this family drama.

This leads us to the general principle, principle #3. When someone compulsively engages in repetitive behavior, family members will invariably conclude that this behavior is quite important to the perpetrator. In the example from principle #1, as mentioned, they conclude that mother likes to do housework AND complain about it. In the example from principle #2, they conclude they have to try to do what they are told while conforming the way they do it to the parent's apparent expectations. 

Far be it for a child to deprive a parent of a cherished role. In the first case, they will “help” their mother by making sure that she has plenty of housework to do, and plenty to complain about.

In order to do so, they may appear to be oppositional to the parent, but the oppositionality is merely an illusion. To borrow a phrase from Marshall Mcluan as co-opted by psychoanalyst Leston Havens, the medium of the total picture of the mother's behavior over the entire history of the relationship takes precedence over single element - particularly any verbal message. The mother's total spectrum of behaviors, in context, is more important that what she says on any specific occasion.



Keeping these three principles in mind, it becomes easy to see why oppositional behavior is so common in dysfunctional families. In cases where parents are ambivalent about themselves, they induce children to appear to disregard verbal messages in favor of some other factor.

This may have biological roots. Attention to non-verbal behavior preceded attention to verbal behavior in the evolution of social animals.

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